JAMES' FAMILY ADVENT HOW TO- ADVENT WREATH

Advent is about waiting, anticipation and longing, and most of the season’s traditions cut right to the chase. They’re about counting down the days.

This is the case for three of our four family traditions. The Advent Calendar swallows time in big chunks, marking each week as it passes by. “The floor banging liturgy” begins its “ticking” as the expectation becomes more intense- sixteen days before the feast arrives.

The two together might be just the thing for most families. I say this because we count with a Jessie tree, too, and this serves the same function as “the floor banging liturgy.” Both mark off individual days (although “the liturgy” begins deep in the season as an outgrowth of the O Antiphon tradition), and both rehearse the story from creation to the birth of Christ. I can see why some people might find this too much. Why two traditions that do the exact same thing? For us the answer is that we enjoy both of them. But it might be wise to pick one or the other, if you are new to either- Jessie Tree or “Floor banging liturgy.”

But which ever way you decide to go, you’re going to need an Advent Wreath. This is a simple Christmas wreath with four candles placed equidistant around it. These are lit consecutively on each of the Sundays in Advent. A fifth candle is placed in the middle for lighting on Christmas morning. As the season progresses, more and more light shines into our darkness. This is one of the lessons the kids shouldn’t be allowed to miss.

Advent wreaths have taken countless shapes. Until last year, when Sandi purchased us an attractive one, we scavenged the house for the needed items. We’ve even done the wreath without the wreath- creating a “circle” of four candles.

The liturgies are as varied as the possible wreath configurations. We like to bless the wreath and candles when we put them out the Saturday before Advent begins. I hope you don’t skip that part. The children need to know what tree branches are for. They need to understand that evergreen branches are God’s love made fragrant and botanical. This is why we bless stuff. We ask our God to allow us to see things for what they were created to be- his love to us and a means of communing with him.

"O God, by whose word all things are sanctified, pour forth Thy blessing upon this wreath, and grant that we who use it may prepare our hearts for the coming of Christ and may receive from Thee abundant graces. Through Christ our Lord."

The Father then sprinkles the wreath with holy water

Ok, you’ve created, procured or simulated a wreath complete with five candles. We’ve blessed it and are ready to go. In case I’ve not been clear, let me spell out what that “going” actually consists of. We are going to count down the weeks ‘til Christmas arrives. The children can see its approaching- his approaching. On the first Sunday we light one candle. On the second Sunday we light a second…so that by the fourth Sunday we’ll have four candles blazing. Some people only use the wreath on Sundays. We light it every evening before dinner, and blow it out before we go to bed.

Like I said, liturgies vary from simple to elaborate- requiring a prayer book for participation. I’d recommend the simpler variety. Here’s the one we use.

O God, as light comes from this candle, may the blessing of Jesus Christ come to us, warming our hearts and brightening our way. May Christ our Savior bring life into the darkness of this world, and to us, as we wait for his coming.

This site has some others that might be appreciated by families with small children. If you’d like other ideas, a quick Google search for Advent Wreath will provide plenty.

JAMES' FAMILY ADVENT HOW TO- THE FLOOR BANGING LITURGY

Something for fathers and mothers to think about- Christmas has a darker side, and without an appreciation of this we won’t be able to grasp the joy of Christmas morning.

Wilfred McClay has written on the need to keep Satan in Christmas. It’s a short read; I hope you take a moment to consider it.

Advent is the time to set the stage. In our home it’s been difficult to adequately convey the sense of darkness and cold that a world without Christ must experience. We’re too comfortable, well fed and warm.

Dante envisioned the deepest level of hell as frozen. Intuitively that feels right. Perhaps those of us who live with winter cold can grasp a small part of what our ancestors must have felt looking out on months of barren, frozen, lightless days. It’s no accident that Christmas falls in winter. Explaining to our children the appropriateness of that timing is part of our Advent calling.

The symbols are ready at hand, if we grasp the presence of the wolf and dragon that’s always implied. Candles, light, and warmth aren’t treasured on a tropical sun-drenched beach.

Every match struck and every bundling against winter’s chill gives opportunity to point out Satan’s role in Christmas. The single most helpful ritual we’ve discovered to point out the before and after of Christmas is a liturgy created by Douglas Jones.

This has become one of our favorite traditions. I want to invite you to play along with us. Be forewarned: neighbors glancing through the window will imagine strange occultic ceremonies. We sit without chairs in a circle. We bang on the floor with “bones." We taste sand and touch tongue to vinegar…which is to say, the kids love it.

It’s hard to keep a straight face. There’s not much point in trying. Have a good time in reminding your children what “long lay the world in sin and error pining” means. We live on this side of Christmas, after all.

When the time comes, I’ll post some pictures. If anyone else plays, I’d love to see yours, too.

ST NICHOLAS DAY: JAMES' FAMILY HOW TO- PART TWO

St Nicholas Day Breakfast

Generally the children wake up early from the excitement. It’s amazing how little “out of the ordinary” celebration it takes to get the kids anticipation going. But there’s another reason for the early rising. We’re going to eat a large breakfast together. This might require that we pass on the school bus this morning.

Southerners know how to do breakfast, and it’s the sort of culinary offering that will kill you. Anything less is hardly worthy of a Saint’s memory. Biscuits, bacon, gravy…

I would love to have a statue of the bishop to serve as a centerpiece for the table. Occasionally I see figures of St. Nicholas that include clerical items- crosier, mitre, etc. Here’s an example that I’ve had my eye on for a while. Something like this would be great as a focal point. We have a special Christmas table setting. This morning it will make its first appearance since the end of last year’s Christmas season.

The point is to make the meal special. Every home has unique items to bring into play. In our case, simply eating a large breakfast together on a school morning makes the occasion stand out.

The one breakfast item that seems out of place (in our home, at least) is a bowl of clementines or oranges. These are blessed and distributed with the following prayer- this is a great way to send the family out into the world with a tangible memorial in hand:

Loving God, you ask us to show kindness and care to everyone. Thank you for good Saint Nicholas who shows us how to give gifts and care to others, especially children.

Bless these oranges that they may remind us of Saint Nicholas' gifts to people in need. Help us to love and care, like Saint Nicholas, for those who need helpand children everywhere.

Amen

Including our God in these times is natural. Talking to him and asking his participation is the least we would do for any guest. A thanksgiving for Nicholas is usually included in the blessing of the food. Here are a number of examples.

Nothing fancy or undoable here. Just an intentional time of good food.

Telling the Story of Nicholas

This portion of our tradition is the most variable. Now that the children have heard the story for a while, it’s easy to ask for them to take turns telling their favorite bits. Asking about the origin of the various symbols is another good way of doing this.

The St. Nicholas Center provides some exceptional story resources. This method might be great with younger children after the meal is finished. In fact, I might give it a try this year.

We’re not talking about prepping for an exam. This ought to be light and fun. Year after year of celebration will reinforce the fact that Nicholas is our children’s brother.

ST NICHOLAS DAY: JAMES' FAMILY HOW TO- PART ONE

It helps to remind myself what I’m up to as a Father on the feast days of the Saints. Off the cuff it seems to me that I’m wanting to 1) provide an opportunity for my family to be together as a family 2) Reinforce my children’s self identity as being a part of a distinct and alien people with distinct and alien views of reality 3) through distinctive rituals 4) and stories 5) Provide positive examples of lives lived in fulfillment of that Christian identity 6) Center all of this in the God who calls us his own through acts of worship and prayer.

Our celebration of the life of our elder brother St. Nicholas provides an opportunity to do each of these things. In our home the festivity involves three distinctive elements:

1) Pretending about St Nicholas’s visitation during the night before December 6th
2) A special breakfast
3) The telling of stories about this blessed saint with a prayer of thanksgiving for his example.

There’s a central yarn that’s told about this generous man that seems to work its way into most of the day’s symbols. It’s the origin of our tradition of hanging stockings on the mantle, and it’s important enough to briefly tell now. This version is taken from the St. Nicholas center:

One story tells of a poor man with three daughters. In those days a young woman's father had to offer prospective husbands something of value—a dowry. The larger the dowry, the better the chance that a young woman would find a good husband. Without a dowry, a woman was unlikely to marry. This poor man's daughters, without dowries, were therefore destined to be sold into slavery. Mysteriously, on three different occasions, a bag of gold appeared in their home-providing the needed dowries. The bags of gold, tossed through an open window, are said to have landed in stockings or shoes left before the fire to dry. This led to the custom of children hanging stockings or putting out shoes, eagerly awaiting gifts from Saint Nicholas. Sometimes the story is told with gold balls instead of bags of gold. That is why three gold balls, sometimes represented as oranges, are one of the symbols for St. Nicholas. And so St. Nicholas is a gift-giver.

Okay. Let’s take a look at what St. Nicholas Day looks like at our home.

1) St. Nicholas Visitation

On the evening of December 5th each of the children put their shoes just outside of their bedroom doors. Each child places a carrot in one of their shoes. To understand this you need to know that St. Nicholas Day is huge in many European countries. Each year TV coverage is given to the ancient Bishop coming ashore on horseback- complete with Mitre and Crosier. The carrots are a sort of Old World version of milk and cookies, but instead of being for jolly 'ole St. Nick, they are a treat for the Bishop’s horse.

The next morning everyone in our house gets up earlier than normal. Esther usually starts the commotion. She peeks out her bedroom door to find that each carrot has been nibbled down to a stub, and every pair of shoes contains a very small and inexpensive gift. Along with the small gift (or during particularly tight years this item is the small gift) there is always a bag of golden wrapped chocolate coins. These coins are meant to remind us of the story of the three daughters and the importance of generous giving.

Items needed:
1) Our Children’s shoes
2) Carrots
3) Chocolate Coins. I’ve been able to find these every year at Dollar type stores- Dollar Tree, Dollar General, etc.

I’ll pick up the other two elements of food and story in the next post.

ST NICHOLAS DAY- WORTH CELEBRATING

I made three suggestions for those who are new to following the story of Christ’s life throughout the year- 1. Observe Advent as a preparation for Christmas. 2. Add St. Nicholas Day to your celebration 3. Observe Christmas as a Season.

It makes sense to begin with the first, because Advent arrives before the others (Dec. 2nd in 2007). So of course, I’m not going to start there. I’m thinking that most people will have some familiarity with Advent and Christmas, but the St. Nicholas Day thing…well, that’s part of Shoppingmas. Right?

Of course not! St. Nicholas is a wonderful, glorious and important brother of our Lord Jesus. As such, he belongs to us. Our children need to know that. Enough of the Egyptian’s plundering our treasures. The biblical precedent is the other way around.

St. Nicholas served as a bishop in what is now modern day Turkey. There are wonderful legends and stories swirling around this dear man. Many of them will sound very familiar- stories of gift giving and stockings, for example.

My personal favorite involves his role at the Council of Nicea. A minister named Arius was telling the story of Jesus in a way that departed significantly from how the apostles had related the tale. Specifically, Arius denied that Jesus was truly God. That’s a big plot change…and a huge deal. The fathers of the church were called together because this competing tale was spreading. Common Christians were beginning to tell the story in this deviant way. One of those summoned t0 this important council was St. Nicholas. When Arius rose to speak and began to deny the divinity of our Lord, the good bishop just couldn’t take it. Apparently he sprang from his seat and lit into the startled speaker…literally. The other bishops and presbyters pulled Nicholas off of Arius and reprimanded Nicholas strongly…although I’m sure they were secretly pleased. (Maybe that’s just me projecting my own redneck persona, though.) It tickles me to think of Santa Claus rolling around on the floor with another fella over the language of the Nicene Creed.

Anyway, every time I recite those precious words, “God of God, Light of Light, very God of very God; begotten, not made, being of one substance with the Father,” I think of good St. Nicholas.

There is a wonderful resource available online: The St. Nicholas Center. Please check it out. There is a great deal of information- including ideas for celebration. If nothing else, check out Who Is St. Nicholas and click around on the links to the left. His connection to our modern Santa Claus is explained. Our children ought to know. This is their heritage.

I’ll post the details of how we celebrate at the James’ house. The amount of enjoyment the children seem to get out of it far exceeds the simple preparation that is necessary. There is plenty of time to make ready....and not much involved. St. Nicholas Day always falls on December 6th. I hope you’ll consider adding this to your family’s Advent celebration.

FOLLOWING CHRIST IN OUR YEAR- A PRACTICAL PROPOSAL

I’ve enjoyed sharing pictures of my family’s celebrations of the Christian Year. I’ve been told that they have encouraged others to join in the fun the next time around; I’m so excited about that. But I’m sure it would be better if the ideas and reminders were posted before the date arrived. That way everyone could begin now…this year.

I want to try to do just that. These preparatory posts will be gathered under Labels for each Season/Holy day and grouped together under a Label entitled Calendar Practical Ideas.

Please contribute to the discussion with ideas, questions, etc. This could be a wonderful resource with your participation.

The most fully packed segment of the year (with the exception of Holy Week) is only a few weeks away. I want to give an overview of the seasons immediately before us- from November 30th- Jan 6th. It can seem a bit overwhelming. With a “heads-up” maybe we can select those things that might be most helpful for our families. Of course there is much more or other that can be done; this is all from the perspective of our home’s traditions.

We have an amazing array of Saint Days during this time. Nov 30th marks the death of St. Andrew, the brother of St. Peter. December 6th is St. Nicholas Day. Dec 21 marks St Thomas’ death; December 26th the martyrdom of St Stephen, and December 28th the killing of the “Holy Innocents” by King Herod.

The Season’s involved are Advent, Christmas and the beginning of Epiphany. The focal points are Dec. 25th and Jan 6th.

Whew!

Our family began small. We added things after the newest addition had become comfortable. A little each year. Remember, the point is to make the passing of time intentional and meaningful by incarnating the story of our Lord and his people into the life of our family... and to do this in a way that is joyful and fun. The Christmas season is too busy already. I know we ended up doing some “weeding.”

If you are new to this, let me suggest that you focus on three things. I think all three are doable for many, but perhaps you would want to tackle one at a time:

1. Observing Advent as a preparation for Christmas.
2. Adding St. Nicholas Day to your celebration
3. Observing Christmas as a Season. There are twelve days to Christmas. I know you knew that, though.

One and three are foundational; the second is just a lot of fun- especially if you have younger children. It is also a powerful time to teach your children the truth that Christ is truly God and perfectly Man, but we'll have more about that in a St. Nicholas Day post(s).

I’ll share with you how our family does each of these three. I hope you’ll do the same with ideas, recipes, etc.

Remember, I'll be posting about a much fuller calendar. Please only bite off what is enjoyable for you at this point of your family's life, and begin with the three suggestions above.