DESIRE 101- Part 5

What Did Your Body Just Say?
Copyright © 2006


The story in Genesis tells us that God created a single individual. He named this individual Human, or better Earthling because he came from the ground. That’s what Adam means. Then God said it wasn’t good for the Earthling to be alone. What did God do to fix this? Bet you said, “He made Eve.” If that’s how you answered, you’d be wrong. That’s not what God did- at least not right away. Scripture says that he first brought the various animals to Adam so that Adam could name them. Sort of odd, huh? Did God believe that Adam might find a suitable mate among the animals? I doubt it. God must have wanted Adam to realize something, himself. There’s a difference in being told a truth and feeling it yourself. God wanted Adam to feel the truth of something. What do you think it was?

We don’t have to guess about the effect this experience had on Adam. Scripture tells us that he realized he was alone. This must mean that he knew that he was different from all the other creatures around him. What was that difference? Unlike the animals that were brought to him, the Earthling was a person.

We tend to think of personhood as being defined by consciousness. You know, a person is someone who thinks and feels; but if this is true, then we must say that animals are persons, too. So there must be a difference that goes beyond mere consciousness. And it was a difference that Adam was able to observe, because he discovered this by naming the other creatures. Looking at animals and people today, what differences do you see?

I’m sure there are many, but two seem to stand out to me. Men and women are conscious of what they look like as they go about doing whatever it is they do. Animals are not. Have you ever had to “go” really bad when other people were around? Did you drop your pants and do it right there in front of everyone? I bet you didn’t. Why not? Has that concern ever stopped a dog or a cat? Do you see what I mean? People are self-conscious. This means that we are aware of ourselves. But in addition to that, we decide whether what we see ourselves doing is bad or good. Then we make a choice based on that judgment. Another way of making the same point is to say that people have free will. While an animal acts on instinct,[i] persons decide what kind of being they wish to be. We become what we do.

A dog or cat can be a wonderful companion, but because they are by nature inferior to man, they can never be a “sustainer-beside-him.”[ii] God wanted Adam to realize that he was alone as a person and that he needed an equal as a partner.[iii]

When God made Eve and brought her to Adam, Adam exclaimed “At last! This is someone like me”

Adam and Eve, male and female together, also reflected the image of God.[iv] There are two distinct ways of being the image of God. Adam was one and Eve the other. Genesis is very clear about that.

Why did God not create a duplicate of Adam to complete this Image of Himself? As we’ve seen, in a very important sense he did. Both Adam and Eve were individually image bearers. Apart from Adam, Eve was alone as a person, too. But in another sense she was wonderfully different. And it was a difference Adam could see. It had to do with bodies. It had to do with sex.

Did you know that sex is about something you are? One day you might have to fill out a job application and they will ask you to indicate your sex. What are they asking? They want to know “Are you a boy or a girl?” Being male or female is what sex is about. Why did God want this sexual difference? It must be that it “says” something that needed to be said.

What is it that makes us male or female? First and foremost it is about our bodies. There are many differences between a man’s and a woman’s body, but the one our minds immediately focus on are the two different ways God has fashioned our genitals- a man’s penis and a woman’s vagina.

Now, what do those things mean? I’ve said that all of creation declares God’s glory. Well, what does the penis and vagina say? I guess they say that God has a sense of humor, but is there more?

We know the man is for the woman and that the woman is for the man. They mirror the persons of the Godhead this way. But what is it that is going on in the Trinity. Each of the persons give and each of the persons receive. Love is going on in the Trinity. It took the bodies of both men and women to show that. A world filled with the bodies of a bunch of Adams wouldn’t yell this out. Nor would a world made up only of Eve’s.

Here’s why: Each of the persons of the Trinity is distinctly themselves and yet each of the persons totally fills the others. They are many and yet one. When this God created the two different Earthlings, he intended that they become one flesh. In some way they too were to image the “manyness” and “oneness” of their God. But more than that, just as the eternal dance of the Trinity resulted in creation spilling out, from this human oneness was to come new life.

What sort of oneness would that be? God decided on this: Just about every living thing begins as two separate halves that combine to make one new and whole individual. These halves contain the plan- the DNA- that directs how the new body will grow and develop. This plan determines what color eyes you will have, your hair, the shape of your nose- everything about your body. This plan is contained in super tiny bodies called chromosomes. It takes 48 chromosomes to form the plan for a complete human being.

Half of these chromosomes come from the mother and half come from the father. When they are brought together, a human person begins to grow. This plan isn’t simply information that gets handed back and forth. It is only contained in the bodies of the mother and father. A part of the body of the both the Mother and Father is given in order to give life to a child. Every human being begins as two separate persons whose bodies meld to make one new person. Every human person, with the exception of one[v], is literally half her father and half her mother. How cool is that!

This special giving of bodies is part of the “oneness” we’re talking about. It is the visible enactment of all the other ways men and women can be one, as well. God said that the man and woman should become one flesh. He meant it. This is done when the woman allows the man to place his penis inside of her vagina. Their two bodies become one. A part of the man- his contribution to the new child’s being- passes into the mother’s body. It remains there for a short time after their physical union is over. If it is able to find the other half, the mother’s half, a new baby begins to grow. It’s as if the man and the woman have melted together to form a third.

When this union of bodies takes place it is very pleasurable for both the man and woman. While creating another life, they give each other great joy. In fact, while it should always be very nice for both the husband and wife it can be truly ecstatic. This enormous pleasure was God’s idea. There are parts of a woman’s body that have no other purpose than to feel pleasure when this happens. This says a great many things when you remember who it was that designed her. This pleasure pleases our God.

The importance of personal choice is highlighted even here. God has ensured that we have to choose this path. A woman has been designed so that a man must thoughtfully and unselfishly lead her to this great pleasure. It is possible for him to enjoy himself, while she does not. Such a relation is sad and selfish. The feast of feasts takes restraint and gentleness on the man’s part. But to those who have experienced it that restraint is beautiful and delicious, hardly a sacrifice at all. The fulfillment of our physical longings declares the truth that Godlike desire gives itself to another and hopes that the beloved will give back in return. Evil desire gives only when a return is guaranteed. The image reaches its purpose when the husband gently and unselfishly, out of a great desire and appreciation for the woman, places himself in her hands for her pleasure and she responds by opening herself to him for his pleasure.

The woman’s body becomes a gift to her husband by giving him great pleasure and the wife becomes a gift through her body to the man. They are gifts to each other. The woman’s body declares the glory of receiving love. The man’s body declares the glory of giving love. Together they declare the glory of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit’s eternal circle dancing. This is why we call this very special act “making love.”

It would be a mistake to think that being a woman means always receiving or that being a man means always giving. Sure, our bodies were designed to make visible one or the other halves of the great circle dance in a special way. But the truth is that we give when we receive and we receive when we give. Making love makes this truth real in a way that nothing else can. It’s impossible to know where the giving ends and the receiving begins. If God has called you to marriage, you’ll know what I mean one day.

This is the answer to the question of “what do male and female bodies mean?” By itself the man’s body doesn’t make a lot of sense. You know, what’s that for? Likewise the woman doesn’t make sense by herself. Together, they make sense, especially to two people in love.

That’s the secret: Men’s and Women’s bodies declare that they are for another. Being a human person means choosing to be a gift to another person.[vi]

This doesn’t mean that we are called to make love to everyone nor that God makes love in the Trinity. Neither is true. Remember that creation and mankind are images of the Trinity. The Trinity isn’t an image of creation[vii]. Rather, our bodies make visible the great truths that God is love and that we are called as persons to give ourselves with faithful integrity and selfless surrender for the good of another. Though the value of every individual person cannot be measured, we can only truly fulfill ourselves in another. Every encounter with another person, no matter how trivial, should enact the pattern that the marriage bed makes so joyfully obvious. That’s what true holiness is- living out the glory of the marriage feast in every encounter of our lives.

We live out the meaning of our bodies when we serve and help other people, when we think of ourselves as being created to be a gift to others. This is what we were created for; and just so we won’t forget it, God has stamped that image onto our bodies. Every time you undress for the shower, your body says to you “Hey, you are a gift for other people.” It ought to be hard to forget. But we forget all the time.

[i] We tend to think this applies to what animals do, but perhaps more important to a comparison with human behavior is the fact that it also applies to what they don’t do. If instinct says “stop eating, your sick”, then an animal fasts. If instinct says “you need to get up and run” that’s what the animal does. People on the other hand are just as liable to answer “but it looks so good” and “but I’m so comfortable”.
[ii] This is literally what God calls Eve in Genesis 2:20. The word translated “woman” in Genesis 2:23 means “from man”. Some people have taken this to mean that she is a step below him, but the point (as the rib from his side makes clear) is that she is his equal. In other words, the fact that she is taken from man indicates “what she is made of” not “who her natural superior is”
[iii] Paul Borgman, Genesis: The Story We Haven’t Heard (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2001) pp 24-27
[iv] Genesis 1:27
[v] Luke 1:35
[vi] Just about everything said in this chapter was given to me through John Paul the Great’s teaching on the Gospel of the Body. Perhaps the best introduction to this magisterial pastor’s thought is Christopher West, The Theology of the Body Explained (Boston: Pauline Books and Media, 2003) As a comparison will show, I owe as great a debt to this brother, as I do to his Teacher.
[vii] We aren’t saying God is a giant chicken when we show that a mother hen’s protection of her chicks is like God’s own protection of his people (Psalms 91:4, Luke 13:31-35).


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